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"`...You hadn't exactly gone out of your way to call 
attention to them had you? I mean like actually telling 
anyone or anything.'
`But the plans were on display...'
`On display? I eventually had to go down to the cellar to 
find them.'
`That's the display department.'
`With a torch.'
`Ah, well the lights had probably gone.'
`So had the stairs.'
`But look you found the notice didn't you?'
`Yes,' said Arthur, `yes I did. It was on display in the 
bottom of a locked filing cabinet stuck in a disused 
lavatory with a sign on the door saying "Beware of The 
Leopard".'"

- Arthur singing the praises of the local council planning 
department.

"`Time is an illusion. Lunchtime doubly so.'
`Very deep,' said Arthur, `you should send that in to the 
"Reader's Digest". They've got a page for people like you.'"

- Ford convincing Arthur to drink three pints in ten 
minutes at lunchtime.

"`This must be Thursday,' said Arthur to himself, sinking 
low over his beer, `I never could get the hang of 
Thursdays.'" 

- Arthur, on what was to be his last Thursday on Earth.

"Pages one and two [of Zaphod's presidential speech] had 
been salvaged by a Damogran Frond Crested Eagle and had 
already become incorporated into an extraordinary new form 
of nest which the eagle had invented. It was constructed 
largely of papier mache and it was virtually impossible for 
a newly hatched baby eagle to break out of it. The Damogran 
Frond Crested Eagle had heard of the notion of survival of 
the species but wanted no truck with it." 

- An example of Damogran wildlife.

"`How do you feel?' he asked him.
`Like a military academy,' said Arthur, `bits of me keep 
passing out.'" ....
`We're safe,' he said.
`Oh good,' said Arthur.
`We're in a small galley cabin,' said Ford, `in one of the 
spaceships of the Vogon Constructor Fleet.'
`Ah,' said Arthur, `this is obviously some strange usage of 
the word "safe" that I wasn't previously aware of.'

- Arthur after his first ever teleport ride.

"`The best way to get a drink out of a Vogon is to stick 
your finger down his throat...'" 

- The Book, on one of the Vogon's social inadequacies.

"`You'd better be prepared for the jump into hyperspace. 
It's unpleasently like being drunk.'
`What's so unpleasent about being drunk?'
`You ask a glass of water.'"

- Arthur getting ready for his first jump into hyperspace.

"`You know,' said Arthur, `it's at times like this, when 
I'm trapped in a Vogon airlock with a man from Betelgeuse, 
and about to die from asphyxiation in deep space that I 
really wish I'd listened to what my mother told me when I 
was young.'
`Why, what did she tell you?'
`I don't know, I didn't listen.'"

- Arthur coping with certain death as best as he could.

"`Ford, you're turning into a penguin. Stop it.'" 

- Arthur experiences the improbability drive at work.

"`I think you ought to know that I'm feeling very 
depressed.'"
"`Life, don't talk to me about life.'"
"`Here I am, brain the size of a planet and they ask me to 
take you down to the bridge. Call that "job satisfaction"? 
'Cos I don't.'"
"`I've got this terrible pain in all the diodes down my 
left side.'"

- Guess who.