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The party adjourned to a hot tub, yes.  Fully clothed, I might add.
		-- IBM employee, testifying in California State Supreme Court

The personal computer market is about the same size as the total potato chip
market.  Next year it will be about half the size of the pet food market and
is fast approaching the total worldwide sales of pantyhose"
		-- James Finke, Commodore Int'l Ltd., 1982

The primary function of the design engineer is to make things
difficult for the fabricator and impossible for the serviceman.

The primary purpose of the DATA statement is to give names to constants;
instead of referring to pi as 3.141592653589793 at every appearance, the
variable PI can be given that value with a DATA statement and used instead
of the longer form of the constant.  This also simplifies modifying the
program, should the value of pi change.
		-- FORTRAN manual for Xerox Computers

	The problem with engineers is that they tend to cheat in order to
get results.
	The problem with mathematicians is that they tend to work on toy
problems in order to get results.
	The problem with program verifiers is that they tend to cheat at
toy problems in order to get results.

The problems of business administration in general, and database management in
particular are much to difficult for people that think in IBMese, compounded
with sloppy english.
		-- Edsger Dijkstra

The program isn't debugged until the last user is dead.

	The programmers of old were mysterious and profound.  We cannot fathom
their thoughts, so all we do is describe their appearance.
	Aware, like a fox crossing the water.  Alert, like a general on the
battlefield.  Kind, like a hostess greeting her guests. Simple, like uncarved
blocks of wood.  Opaque, like black pools in darkened caves.
	Who can tell the secrets of their hearts and minds?
	The answer exists only in the Tao.
		-- Geoffrey James, "The Tao of Programming"

The proof that IBM didn't invent the car is that it has a steering wheel
and an accelerator instead of spurs and ropes, to be compatible with a horse.
		-- Jac Goudsmit

The question of whether computers can think is just like the question of
whether submarines can swim.
		-- Edsger W. Dijkstra